Knitting and crocheting away this month

Figure I should do an update since I haven't written on my blog for a while. John and I are doing fine after Randy passed in January. I've been plugging away at the to do list and have everything in my name and have managed all the red tape issues that go with having your husband pass away. His memorial is next week.

As far as my fibro goes, I had a couple flares in the last three months, but I'm doing better now. Funny how I can stress a part of my body and not feel anything until later that day or the next, and then it takes weeks to recover. My survival, right now, depends on me being able to walk everywhere and be alert when I'm reading and filling out forms, so having an ankle go out or my knees just isn't acceptable. I stressed my arm on the day that Randy went to the convalescent hospital by trying to straighten him on the gurney when the medical transport guys wouldn't do it, and I wasn't able to reach over my head with my arm for days afterwords. Made getting food out of the cupboard really interesting. It doesn't help that my medical care right now is pretty etchy. I was changed from SSI to Survivor benefits (disabled widow) and that changed me from medicaid to medicare. Now I have a deductible and have to buy my own prescriptions.  Not easy when you make as little as I do.

My knitting and crocheting are coming along. I have been trying to sell it on ebay and ebid, but haven't been real successful. Right now I have several things I'm trying to sell

 I attempted to sell my doily, but if I'd have continued, it would have sold for less than what I spent on the thread so I canceled the sale

 These didn't sell either and I ended up donating them to a thrift shop in town that uses what they made from selling things to help out victims of domestic violence.

 I gave this bag to the thrift shop as well.

 As well as this doily

 This bag is still on e-bay, but it doesn't look promising. I've ran it three times and nothing so far.

This is the only item that I made that has a bid on it. Hopefully it will get more before the auction is done.

I'm having a lot of hand pain (my knuckle in my left thumb keeps stiffening up), but I keep pressing on. Right now I'm working on a throw rug made from plarn and the thrift shop gave me a ton of fabric to use to make throw rugs to donate so I need to get to work on them.

I got this book in the mail from Abebooks.com. It has some great ideas on how to knit using items you find around your home instead of yarn. "Rags to Riches-Ideas to Inspire the Thrifty Knitter" by Mary-Jane Holmes. Looks like some great ideas in it.

Are knitting and jogging in the same catagory?

I found this interesting article while I was browsing the internet tonight. http://blog.gaiam.com/blog/can-knitting-give-you-a-runner%E2%80%99s-high/

It all has to do with neurotransmitters. We trigger the same chemicals in our brains that people who run do. I know that when I'm in a room with no distractions and I'm knitting, I get into a kind of buzz where I'm just relaxed and knitting like crazy.

My favorite line in the article is: "One caveat? Don’t try to do both simultaneously. It’s difficult (and potentially dangerous) to operate an elliptical machine while knitting!" I seriously considered knitting while walking on the treadmill, but thought better of it while looking at my pointy needles and just read knitting books instead. 

I spent Valentine's day knitting. LOL Guess that shows how my love life is going... I made a child sized hat and hope to make some mittens and a scarf to match.

 The best thing about knitting hats is how fast they work up. I made this one in a day. 
It wasn't such a bad day after all. I was a little down that my Valentine isn't here this year but the kids knew how to cheer me up. Chelle sent me some flowers; yellow roses. They have special meaning to me since Randy sent me some yellow roses when I had Michelle. He was stationed in Texas at the time and thought he should give me yellow roses from Texas. Here is my Valentine roses:

 

Sleep Issues and Sleeping

So, here's the latest issue with knitting while dealing with fibro. I can't stay awake. I have had to depend on coffee and soda with caffeine in order to do so and now that I'm trying to cut it out, I fall asleep at my desk while I knit. This is taking a huge toll on how fast I knit. So far, the only thing I've found to improve my energy level is to take naps. My production speed is way compromised by my fibro while I try to make items to sell. The last pair of socks, which should have taken about 2 to 3 days took over a week instead. 

They turned out nice, but, Wow, did they take a long time. I hope that eventually I can get past the headaches and sleepiness with time.

Textured socks

I started this pair of socks the day before yesterday and just finished the first sock today. This was one of those socks where I stared at the yarn and thought, "I really don't want to do another fair Isle style sock or a stockinette only sock that's solid colored." So I looked online at my favorite site that shows different stitch patterns, picked out a likely candidate and used my normal, memorized, pattern to make a textured, soft purple sock. Unfortunately, my phone camera sucks so just pretend that this blue sock is purple.

Now on to get the mate done. Hopefully I can do the second sock a little faster and not fall asleep while I'm knitting (stupid fibro fog!).

Excited about Knitting again!

All it takes for me is to make a trip to a craft store. That's how easy I am regarding yarn and knitting! I spend the day at my friend, Dianna's house. She asked me to come over after asking me if I would like to go into a craft business together.

It was a great day. We put details on paper and chose what we would like to make, where we want to sell, and made a list of materials we need. I'm going to knit hats, gloves, and socks as well as baby cloths and kitchen items. I'm also going to do a little crocheting, especially Christmas designs and small doilies that she can use with the cards and hair clips that she wants to make. I'm really excited about getting back to work on this after taking so much time away from my plans for taking care of Randy. 

We're going to look into selling at flea markets, craft fairs, and online on e-bay. Dianna also has a friend back east that is offering to find places in her area to sell the things we make. 

Then we did what any respectable knitter would do on such an occasion. We went yarn shopping. I got some nice cotton yarn to use for the kitchen sets I'm going to make. I'm really pleased and ready to start. This is what is going to really tell if John and I can survive on our own in our little place.

Yarn that I plan to use to make a dishcloth for the kitchen set I'm making to sell.

The Spiritual Side of Me

I decided, during all of the insanity of the last few months, that I needed to attend to my spiritual side a little more. I was baptized into the LDS (for those of you who aren't sure what that is, its the Mormon) church when Randy and I were first married. I had times of being inactive and other times when I was very active and had callings within the church. When we started having problems in our marriage, I stopped going. I told myself it was because I was against their stand on gay marriage, that it was because it was a patriarchal church, because I didn't like the commandments that they follow, etc. But I think back and I'm pretty sure that the biggest reason was because I didn't want to be involved in something that Randy was involved with and felt I  had to leave in order to sever all links to him. So I went through this whole period in my life when I was "searching" for what I believed. 
This is what I came up with: 1. I believe in God. I think that most of the other belief systems that I looked at believe in the same over all deity, we all just call him by different names. 2. I believe in the savior. I think its interesting that a lot of people will claim that he was just a prophet (like that puts him in a lower class bracket than a savior), but they still want to believe in him. I would be able to say that also, except that I had a personal experience that made me a believer and that kind of makes it hard to just change my mind. 3. I believe in the Holy Ghost. 4. I don't have a testimony on Joseph Smith, but I do believe that Heavenly Father hasn't just cut us off from having prophets and from new revelation and therefor I can't disprove it either. 
When a person is going through extreme times like the death of a spouse, the need for the comfort of a belief system can be quite strong. While being with Randy these last few months didn't exactly make me feel a need to be in the same belief system as him, I did feel a need to find a belief system that I had the most ties to in the past. The LDS church fit that role for me. I have had some of the most powerful and happy memories while being associated to that church. I had an overpowering feeling that I wanted to be in the chapel at church and soak in the feeling of peace that I got there in the past. I needed the support from a group of people that would welcome me in with open arms and I needed the feeling that I could talk (pray) to God and get help while I deal with sadness and loss. 
I started back last week and it was everything that I needed. I had a huge "ahhhh" moment of relief when I sat in the sacrament hall and soaked in the peacefulness there. 
I am a person who believes that you never do anything halfway. If you are going to follow a belief system, you immerse yourself in it. Yesterday I signed up for everything at church. Now I have what I need. I have the peace of the church, I can get involved with the community and be comfortable that I am doing so in a safe group of people, and I can get out and get some social life that I need in order to get through this period of mourning. 
When people tell you that God doesn't do anything without a reason, I believe that my life right now is an example of that. Yes, losing Randy is hard and I would do anything to make it not have to be, but it did and I have to move on with my life. But in losing Randy, I now have a home that is affordable, the start of a craft business that I believe that I can support myself and John with, a town I can get involved in, and a church that I understand and that gives me comfort. I feel like I am becoming a whole person.

Enough about religion! Look! I found this great link being shared on twitter today and thought it was something I would like to share. It goes with the whole idea of using knitting as a way of completing one's social circle and enriching life. http://www.bostonglobe.com/lifestyle/style/2013/02/04/knitting-cooking-and-reading-this-male-bonding/xAHyX6QXIPvaaLpGXXnLHI/story.html?s_campaign=sm_tw